Mental Toughness Tools

It was 7pm and, as I walked into Whole Foods, I was wishing for the day to be over. It had been an unfortunate day at work and all I wanted to do was grab a few items at the grocery store and go home.

As I was walking around looking for lettuce and avocado, Carlos, the man in charge of the produce section, asked me if I would like to taste the perfect apple. I was about to say “no thank you”, but then I looked at Carlos, saw his smile and the sparkle in his eye and decided that I wanted to experience the joy he was portraying. I took a bite of his apple and it was perfect. He told me that these apples were the sweetest I would ever taste, but they would only be this perfect for a few more days. Although apples were not on my shopping list, I asked him if he would pick four I could take home.

With my apples in hand, I walked over to the avocado section and began to feel around for three good ones. Carlos called me over and said that the better avocados were in the box he had just brought out from the back. I walked over to him and, once again, he asked me if I wanted to taste the perfect avocado. He said he had been working with fruits and vegetables for fifteen years and promised me that, with the avocado he picked, I would be able to easily peel off the skin.  He was right. It was the perfect avocado. I asked him to select three for my shopping cart.

It was evident that Carlos was knowledgeable about produce. It was even more evident that Carlos was passionate, enthusiastic and had a great deal of pride for his job. I wanted to continue to feel Carlos’ energy and joy. I was hooked and asked him to show me what other ‘perfect’ fruits he had for me to taste. I ended up leaving 45 minutes later with three grocery bags full of fruits and vegetables.

I share this story because you have the opportunity to turn someone’s day around, as Carlos did for me, and get more business. Carlos was hanging around the produce section waiting for someone like me to make smile. You could do the same thing. Walk around the club and approach a person or two and share your enthusiasm for health and fitness.

Carlos gave me a free bite of the perfect apple. He even played a game by asking me to guess the apple’s name. You can provide free knowledge to the person you interact with and include a friendly game to further grasp their attention.

Carlos showed me how much he loved what he did. I felt that energy and chose to stay as long as I could with the hope that his joy would give me a happy ending to my terrible day. You can share your joy and enthusiasm with club members and have the same influence on them as Carlos had on me. As soon as I got home, I told my family about my experience. I’m even telling you the story because it’s so powerful. Wouldn’t you like the members you interact with to talk about you when they get home?

Lastly, remember that I purchased a lot more than I had planned. The people you spend time with at the club could easily turn into new clients. What a bonus!

Believe and Achieve,
Dr. Haley

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What do fitness enthusiasts want from a personal trainer and group fitness instructor? They want to (1) have fun and (2) get results.

Some enthusiasts will also say they want to learn new training methods and understand how to perform an exercise correctly. When you think about it, learning new methods is to prevent boredom and keep them interested and motivated (i.e. have fun). Understanding proper technique will help them achieve their goals (i.e. get results).

What fitness enthusiasts need in order to get what they want is where you most likely find resistance. How many of your clients jump at the chance to test their fitness levels each month? How many of them are eager to log their training, nutrition and overall feelings each day? When your participants have completed the instructed 15 repetitions, how many of them choose to push their boundaries and perform an extra two to five repetitions?

The best way to give fitness enthusiasts what they need in order to get what they want is to follow these three tips:

1). Be as informal as you can be. There is no need for formal testing sessions. If you are doing one-on-one training with a client, once a month, incorporate a few exercises that are part of fitness testing and keep track of the progress made. Do not tell him/her that you’re recording the performance. At the end of month, show him/her how much they have improved.

If you are teaching a class, it will be more difficult to keep testing informal, but very easy to frame the testing as fun, exciting and a great way to learn more about your personal fitness state. Have your club create a lot of ‘hype’ around your testing class. When you advertise and when you teach the class, focus on what your participants want: to have fun and get results.

2) Treat the required tools (e.g. journaling, goal achieving, pushing boundaries) as a natural part of the training process. In other words, create a system for all of your clients that is guaranteed to work. For best results, check out http://www.TheUltimateAchievementJournal.com.

3) Whatever you do and whatever you say during your sessions, always come back to what your client wants: to have fun and get results. Tell them that writing things down will significantly improve their chances of losing the weight they want. Advise them that pushing the boundaries by performing one more repetition will get them closer to the ‘finish line’.

Find out, early, what type of training your participants enjoy and incorporate them in the programs you create.

Believe and Achieve,
Dr. Haley

P.S. Leave a comment to tell me what you think or if you have any questions.
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When we think about improving our communication skills, we often focus on speaking and not listening. When training clients, however, listening is just as important as speaking because it will help you to better understand your clients’ wants and needs so that you can design a fitness program specifically for them.

Just as any other mental skill, your listening skills can be improved by practicing the following three behaviors: (1) paraphrasing, (2) asking questions, and (3) providing feedback.

1. Paraphrasing involves repeating what your clients have just said using different words. For examples, if your client says, “I have been having trouble with my hamstrings lately. They have been really tight the last two weeks”. You can say, “Let me see if I have got this right. You have noticed you have stiff hamstrings during the last two weeks we have been training”.

Paraphrasing keeps you involved in the conversation. It will also reduce your chances of misunderstanding your clients because you are giving them the opportunity to confirm or disconfirm your interpretation. Lastly, it will help you to remember what your client has said because you have now spoken the same message.

2. Asking questions opens the door for communication. Take advantage of every time someone has the courage to come up and say something about your training. At first, they are most likely testing the waters to see if you are interested in what they have to say. By asking them questions you are essentially telling them you are interested. Suddenly you stand out amongst your fellow trainers.

3. Providing constructive feedback is not only the best way to support your clients, it also forces you to listen to what they have to say. In order to provide effective constructive feedback to a client who has been having trouble with his/her hamstrings, you must truly understand what he/she is saying.

Call to Action

Listening has become a passive activity. I challenge you to begin activity listening to your participants by participating in one or more of paraphrasing, asking questions, or providing constructive feedback to your clients. Select a  method in advance and set a goal to implement it each time a client sends you a message.

Believe and Achieve,
*Haley Perlus, Ph.D.*

P.S. Leave a comment to tell me what you think or if you have any questions.
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